


Her Favorite Color Was Yellow

by fklve



Category: BLACKPINK (Band), DEAN (Korean Musician), Monsta X (Band), Red Velvet (K-pop Band), SHINee, YG Entertainment | YG Family, 방탄소년단 | Bangtan Boys | BTS
Genre: Angst, Breaking the Law, F/F, F/M, Fluff, Love, M/M, One-Sided Attraction, Pining, Trainee AU, ambiguous cheating, coming of age type of stuff, drugs and alcohol sometimes, friendships, it's life, this is about growth and making stupid mistakes and maybe learning!, undefined relationships, underground music AU
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2018-07-26
Updated: 2018-07-26
Packaged: 2019-06-16 13:11:02
Rating: Mature
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 3
Words: 13,384
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/15437775
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/fklve/pseuds/fklve
Summary: ❝ Slow burn. ❞





	1. prologue ;

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> **Music |** [365 FRESH - Triple H (트리플 H)](https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=8gPQenyj1nI&index=17&list=PLi3Rpvfy25c1hrshfNMaxn__jYehRx5Qv)

Side-eying the review mirror, I noticed the police cars—or what appeared to be police cars due to the noise that trailed after them—racing right behind the car we were in. Honestly, at this point they could have been chasing us for a number of things.

_It could be the money in the back of the car that we had no idea how it ended up there._

_It could be because we had stolen a car._

_It could be due to the fight the stranger next to me had instigated back there in the middle of the highway with that other strange boy currently sitting in the backseat of the car._

_It could be the fact that we picked up_ another _boy right off the sidewalk._

_I mean, without knowing the circumstances that could look like kidnapping._

_Maybe it was. I had no idea who this new kid was. If we started picking up more people we would have to start sitting in each other’s laps. I was not moving from my spot next to Agent 007. I’d volunteer to throwing anyone new into the trunk._

_It could_ also _be that they had finally found the body of the man I killed back in the recording studio._

_Then again, it could just be the speed we were driving at…_

_Wishful thinking, since there were about 20 cars in hot pursuit behind us._

Giving the blur of cars on our tail one last narrowed eye look, I sighed.

Humming, I turned the driver, eyeing the intricate lines of a tattoo that seemed to spiral from the neckline of his black shirt towards his jaw, barely visible from the side I was sitting on. Hot.

“What did you say your name was? Agent 007?” I said, incredulously. I tried to catch his eyes despite the fact that he was driving. I didn’t care much for risks or danger at the moment.

Smiling the cheekiest grin that showed off dimples, he threw me a quick glance before wiping the smile off his face as he quickly looked back to the front; swerving sharply to the right into an alleyway.

“Aish hyung, why would you do that!? Now we’re definitely going to get caught trapped in an alleyway!” Came a whine from the back, the voice sounding strangely familiar. The sudden turn had turned all the car occupants into a pile of limbs. When I turned back to look at the boy’s face, it was blocked by the darkness of the car, along with the hoodie he was wearing pulled all the way up. All that could be seen were a few blond strands. Squinting, I tried to make out any recognizable feature while hanging onto the arm of Agent 007 I had grabbed to prevent myself from squishing my face against his crotch at the sudden turn.

Ignoring the whining boy, Agent 007 spoke up, “distractions are the only thing that will get us caught right now.” I narrowed my eyes at him, getting the feeling that comment was aimed at me.

“How sad, and here I thought you had been trained to multitask,” I simpered at him, pulling up my legs and tucking them in; stretching to gently rest my chin against his shoulder with my arms wrapped around his right arm now.

Chuckling, he replied back, “Call me Dean.”

“Like James Dean?” I said, giggling. The intoxication of the earlier shots I had having _everything_ to do with how relaxed I was at this moment. That and the fact that my mind was still racing trying to just focus on the past 48 hours.

Showing his cute cheeky grin at me once again, he laughed. It was like balm for the soul.

“I think I will stick with 007 until I figure out your real name then” I said, pouting slightly.

“I will tell you mine if you tell me yours.”

“Then—”

“Hyung! They’re gaining on us!”

Mildly irritated at having been interrupted, I turned around and glared back at the boy I had been trying to analyze earlier. His back was to me now, having fully turned around to look back at the cars.

“I don’t think those are the cops,” came a voice to my left, quite and calm.

“Ah, Jiho, I didn’t expect you to wake up so fast,” mumbled 007, as he stepped on the gas and peered through the rearview mirrors.

The boy who had spoken looked up at me through wavy blond strands of hair, throwing a wink before replying back. He was certainly no _boy._ Just like 007 sitting next to me.

“Well what other outcome would you have expected? That I never wake up? You almost broke my neck trying to knock me out back there in front of everyone.”

While Jiho sounded aggravated, the smile playing at his rosy lips along with the wink he sent me informed me that he was just joking.

Without my permission, I smiled back, watching as his smile broadened as I let out a giggle.

“Yah! Let’s play some music! The night is still young and I have total faith that our handsome Agent will not let us get caught! I want to sing!” I yelled, laughing as I twisted around to turn the radio on.

As soon as the song started, everyone seemed to recognize the chorus playing, and as if in sync, we all started signing to the top of our lungs, turning the windows down to inform the whole street of the racket going on outside their cozy homes.

Agent 007’s hand left the shift stick to squeeze my left knee, taking it off just to turn the heat on after noting my frozen skin.

As he increased the speed and we started to leave the strange cars behind us, I smiled faintly, thinking that this was exactly what I needed to get away from it all. To get away from Jin-Ah and the domino effect that her betrayal had unleashed upon my life. To forget everything I had just gone through before I had meet my very own James Dean. At least for now. At least for now, I wanted to forget.

I needed to get away from what I had thought was the love of a century.

 _She was my yellow paint,_ I thought faintly. The words resonating through my head as I leaned in to lightly kiss 007′s lower jaw, giggling when his cute dimples made an appearance once again.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> More characters will be added later in the story. Last but not least, I want to thank whoever takes the time to read what I post, you’re more than appreciated.


	2. Chapter 1 ;

_Monday, July 25, 2011_

It was a warm, late afternoon.

The light filtering through my closed eyelids felt warm against my skin, filling my body with comfortable warmth, leaving my mind in a sort of limbo between the real and sleeping world. The resting area was completely silent apart from the soft piano key notes filtering through my subconscious, bringing me back fully to the real world as a soft smile started forming on my lips when I recognized the tune being played. Swinging my legs that were tossed over the arm of the couch, I tucked them in under myself as I willed my body to fully rid itself of the final vestiges of sleep, raising myself up to throw my arms over the back of the couch. Groggily blinking my eyes, I realized the scene hadn’t changed much from when I had laid down a few minutes earlier.

Seulgi was still fully concentrated on the piano, bent over it while trying her best to play the classical songs she had taught herself by ear to play. Watching as she furrowed her eyebrows in concentration, I sighed. It had been a few days since we had had any free time like this; any downtime to just relax and enjoy each other’s company. Having met her less than two months ago when we both became trainees at the same agency, she was quickly becoming an indispensable _friend_ in my life. Frowning, I realized that that was the wrong term to really label her with. I had two best friends. I loved them to death and back. But this was different. My feelings felt jumbled up whenever I was around her, filling me with happiness and giddiness—she was a very _special_ person in my life.

Before I could keep analyzing what _special_ meant, Seulgi turned around, smiling once she noticed I was awake.

“Ah… Seohyeon-ah, did you have a good rest?”

Giggling, I informed her that I hadn’t actually fully fallen asleep.

Teasingly, she replied back quickly, “Ahhh, I could have sworn I heard some faint snoring from the direction of the couch.”

As I felt my cheeks start to fill with warmth, I looked away as I stuttered, “I’m not lying Seulgi, I swear, your piano skills were just so good I felt the need to close my eyes to fully appreciate them.”

As her smile got bigger, she looked back to the keys, softly smiling, her lips seemingly holding back many things that wanted to spill forth from her mouth.

“Thanks, Seohyeon…”, she giggled. “But I’m not that good and you know it. What little I know is just me messing around for years with the keys.”

Getting up from the couch, I started walking over to her side.

“And that’s exactly why I think it’s amazing. The fact that you know how to play this well without any formal instruction is pretty crazy for me, so I love listening to you play.”

As I got closer to the piano bench where she was sitting, she scooted over without looking up again, silently offering me some space to sit next to her.

Gingerly sitting down, comforting warmth spread from my stomach to my chest, and I smiled as I softly tried to press a few keys on the piano.

“The choir back at my school taught me how to read a music sheet, so I could properly sing the notes I was supposed to… but it’s pretty great how you even taught that to yourself, and on top of that are able to recreate songs all by ear…”

No longer wanting to keep the praising session of her skills going, Seulgi started playing some notes on the piano again, ducking her head so I wouldn’t see her blush. She seemed to be getting a bit shy due to the complements, which I was more than happy to give out to make her realize how much of an amazing person I thought she was.

Abruptly, she stopped, and turned to look at me with a mischievous smile.

“Want to sing along as I play the piano?”

Immediately going red in the face, I looked away from her and faced the piano keys. “Ah… well… you see… I’m not sure. My voice isn’t that good, I just know the basics of how to sing a note properly and—”

Cutting me off, she replied quickly. “I’ve heard you sing Seohyeon, your voice is really unique, but that doesn’t mean it’s not good. You were also recruited by the agency for a reason you know.”

As she bumped her shoulder with mine, her body moved closer to my own, the warmth radiating from her body warming me up further than the sun coming in through the huge windows next to us ever could.

Clearing my throat, I replied to her original request, “then, let’s do the song you always play when we are on break. The one that you play when thinking of your girlfriend.”

“Ah! Yeah, let’s do that one, I know the chorus really well for the piano since I tried to teach myself how to play it. You know the lyrics, right?”

Smiling faintly at the bright smile that formed on her face when I mentioned her significant other, my chest clenched lightly, but the warmth of her presence and happiness next to me made the faint pain an easily and quickly forgettable memory.

“Start playing then, and sing with me, too. I’ll join in.”

Nodding as she scooted even closer to me to fully be able to reach all the keys on the piano, she pulled her sleeves up.

As the first few notes of _Let Her Go_ started to play, bittersweet happiness filled the atmosphere around us.

Clearing her throat once the piano intro approached its end, she started to sing.

“ _Well you only need the light when it’s burning low…_

_Only miss the sun when it starts to snow._

_Only know you love her when you let her go.”_

As the song approached a slight pause, she eyed me from the side, signaling me that my turn to sing the next few lines was up.

“ _Only know you’ve been high when you’re feeling low…_

_Only hate the road when you’re missing home._

_Only know you love her when you let her go._

_And you let her go.”_

When the chorus began, she joined me, both of us smiling as we sneaked glances at each other.

As we sang, she had to occasionally look back to the keys to make sure she wouldn’t mess up, giving me the chance to observe her better as I did not have to worry about playing the piano at the same time like she did.

I played with the idea that maybe, just maybe, I was developing feelings for her, feelings that I had previously only experienced with _boys_ , but that was ridiculous. After all, I felt no sexual attraction to her, only _feelings_. Feelings that were confusing, new, exciting, and most importantly, _warm_. There was no other way to describe how they felt. So, with that conclusion, my smile widened. Yes, she was just a friend. A very important one, that I felt beyond happy I had been able to meet in this life.

As the song came to an end, we both started laughing, enjoying the fading sunlight streaming through the windows.

“Mmmm, do you think we have time for one more song?” She murmured.

Enjoying the way we were sitting so close together, I reluctantly looked at my phone. It was 4.54pm.

“Shit! Seulgi, we’re late! Hurry, get up! We have 6 minutes to get to the practice room before the coach notices we’re the only ones missing!”

Quickly rising to my feet, I pushed the piano bench back roughly, quickly covering the piano with its protective cover after Seulgi had closed the keys and collected her own phone form the top of the piano. As she grabbed her penny board from the side of the couch I had been lying on, we both rushed out of the spacious room, running towards the staircase to make it in time.

Breathless, Seulgi suggested, “next time I will look up the music sheet for _When I Was Your Man_ , and we can sing that, so make sure you know the lyrics by then!”

Giggling along as we dashed up the stairs together, I agreed. “Call!”

* * *

 

 _Sunday,_ _August 28, 2011_

“Come on, Seohyeon-ah… Let’s go eat!”

As Seulgi sped by me in her penny board, I tried to hurry my steps to keep up with her. When she noticed my reluctance to run, she started circling back around to me, stopping right before we could crash into each other.

“What’s wrong? You okay?” Her voice was low, concern seeping through the cracks as she slowed down to walk next to me with her penny now under her arm.

Smiling slightly, I replied, “I’m fine Seulgi, don’t worry… I’m just really tired today.”

“But it’s Sunday! We had a half-day, which never happens, and we don’t have to go into practice early tomorrow morning. Did you not sleep well at night? I passed by your suite yesterday night and saw the light on, but I wasn’t sure if it was you or one of your roommates that was in the common area still awake.”

Blushing at the fact that I had been caught, I meekly responded, “It was me. The other day Gun-ssi approached me to discuss my progress. My rapping isn’t as good, and he mentioned that my dancing also needed more practice. So I stayed up late practicing choreographies and learning lyrics to do better today. So I was disappointed that the day got cut off early today…”

Understanding dawning on her face, she turned to me as she opened the door to the lunch area while patting my head softly.

“It’s okay, Seohyeon… Now that this week’s evaluation got moved to Monday you’ll have an extra day to practice more. Just please make sure to sleep tonight. I already worry because I know you skip meals.”

As we settled onto the table, I mumbled back, “I don’t skip meals because I want to… I forget to eat and then by the time I realize it, curfew is upon us and I cannot leave the room to grab anything to eat. Not that anything would be open at that time anyway…”

As she chucked, she started walking to the food area to pick up something to eat.

“If you say so.”

“What’s our budget for today?”

“Well, if we poll our money together like always, we can manage to get a large, simple carrot salad to share…”

“We might have to get the medium size. We need to buy a new water bottle to refill. The one we have is getting old. It’s not good to reuse them too much,” I said, putting a new water bottle alongside the preserved salad on the counter. I moved the large sized one to the size, indicating that we would not buy that one.

“You’re right…” She mumbled, as we paid for our food. We needed to save up a bit to buy durable water bottles for the both of us.

As we moved along to the table we had grabbed earlier to eat together, she seemed to unconsciously place her hand on my lower back, where tingles started to spread. Clearing my throat, I threw my arm over her shoulders, speeding us up towards our table before someone rudely took it.

To distract myself from her, I focused on the person that was more… reasonable of me to pay attention to. Jimin. I needed to pick up a package from Jimin. That’s who I needed to focus on.

“Seulgi. I need to pass by the mail center window to pick up a package. I need to head out before it closes, so I’ll get going.”

Furrowing her brows, she questioned me, “Oh? But It’s only about to be 3pm, I thought it closed at 4:30pm?”

Quickly replying as I stood up without looking at her, I gathered my items as fast as I could.

“Ah no, it’s Sunday Seulgi, they close at 3pm today.”

Quickly waving to avoid a hug, I backed away quickly so she would not notice I had not eaten at all. All the squirming my stomach did around her was starting to make me nauseous and confused.

Right before I fully turned around, I saw her lips press together. In worry or doubtfulness? Did I act too suspicious just now? Nervously looking at my feet as I adjusted my bag on my shoulder, I did not notice the fast approaching figure in front of me as we crashed, barely managing not too fall as we knocked into each other.

“Aishhh my head!!! Seohyeon, look what you did… Your rock head has now guaranteed me a headache for the rest of the day!”

Quickly looking up while holding onto my own throbbing forehead, a smile quickly spread across my face.

“Yah! You brat! Who are you talking to like that, Ggukie?”

He was grinning wide as he leaned down to pick up the bag he had dropped when he bumped into me. The kid was a monster. He was 2 years younger than Seulgi and I, a baby at 14, his soft baby fat still present, despite how tall he was. Quickly giving him a once over, I noticed his black hair was sticking to his face, his clothes dirty.

“Did you just come from dance practice? I thought we all had gotten an unexpected half day.”

I eyed him warily as I backed up a few steps, not wanting a sweaty hug on the day that my own dance practice session had been canceled.

“Yes noona, but my main focus is dance, so I want to get better. I ended up sta- staying a bit longer…”

As he drifted off, he moved closer towards my left side, slightly crowding me. As I got ready to ask him about his weird behavior, a girl dashed by my right side from behind me, on a rush to catch the closing elevator.

Giggling, I didn’t say anything, just quietly watched as Jungkook’s body relaxed once again once the girl had passed us, slowly moving a few paces away from me once again.

“Well, I have to go get a packet from a friend back home. Want to keep me company?”

Grinning again, he exclaimed loudly, “yes, noona!”

As I laughed at his enthusiasm, I let out a yelp when he suddenly grabbed me by the wrist and pulled me behind him, running to the mail center.

“Yah, Ggukie! You’re being really abusive today!”

Laughing as he kept running, he yelled without looking back at me, “Sorry noona, but we have 5 minutes before they close the window if you want to be able to get that packet from your _boyfriend_!”

Immediately feeling my face burn all over, I yelled back, “You disrespectful little piece of crumb, Jimin is _not_ my boyfriend!”

I had no idea how he had even deducted that the packet I was picking up was from Jimin.

“Sure, noona! You just like to kiss him and flirt and hold hands!”

Before I could form a retort, we arrived at the mail center doors, so I quickly went inside and showed the lady behind the desk my ID card.

“Box 85.” I said, trying to catch my breath as I glared sideways at the culprit. Sometimes I regretted confiding in him about this. He was too good at reading the situation, which became a deadly mix when combined with his lack of filter around friends.

“… I guess we’re casually dating, Jungkook. But it’s not serious at all, we both agreed not to get too involved, since being part of different companies is hard enough as it is.” I grumbled.

Softening his eyes, he put a hand on my shoulder as we waited.

“Noona… the truth is…”

Eyeing him warily as I waited for him to continue, I thanked the lady behind the counter.

“The truth?”

“You just made him up to pretend at least _someone_ likes you, right?”

“Yah!”

As he ran away, he cackled, knowing I wouldn’t be able to catch him, but if he had stayed after that last comment, he would have died a slow death. That baby monster crumb had too much energy—it was ridiculous.

Blowing up my cheeks in indignation, I let out a loud sigh as I ripped open the soft package in my hands as I got closer to my dorm.

Bending to pick up the note that had fallen when I pulled out a dark cloth from inside the package, I read it.

**Here’s my softest sweater to keep you warm.**

**I checked the weather and noticed that it gets really cold where you are, and I don’t want you to catch a cold without me there to take care of you.**

**\- Jimin ♡**

Mouth gaping like a fish as I stopped outside of my dorm room, warmth spread throughout my body while my heart beat erratically in my ears. I was drowning in _feelings_ , in the strong _thump, thump, thump,_ of my heart caused by just a few lines from Jimin. Unfolding the soft material in my hands, tears welled up in my eyes as I hugged the dark blue hoodie close to my own body, noticing that he hadn’t washed it before sending it to me. I blushed, recalling when I had mentioned it to him that his smell calmed me when I was too anxious about anything. Taking a deep breath in, I smiled. He had sent me his favorite sweater after I had jokingly told him that I wanted something to remember him by, in particular wanting his favorite sweater, which he never lent out to anyone.

Pulling out my phone, I shoot him a quick text.

Seohyeon [15:28:03]: Thank you Jimin-ah. Just so you know, you’re never getting this back~

Jimin [15:29:01]: Good. I want you to wear it all the time. I miss you.

Jimin [15:29:03]: A lot.

I missed him, too.

Terribly.

* * *

 

_Friday, August 09, 2013_

_04:52AM_

Waking up with all the air knocked out of my lungs, my bunkmate squirmed as she tried to find a comfortable place on top of me and my blankets.

“Seohyeon! Oh my heart, it’s your birthday! You precious bunny, wake up!”

Grunting, I tried to bury myself deeper into my covers to no vail, knowing that if I didn’t move soon, more bodies would start piling up on top of me.

“My first wish is to sleep in until my alarm goes off… please…” I croaked out, as I squinted into the darkness to try to make out the other three figures looming over my bed.

“No can do, bunny!”

“Pleaseeeee…” Whining was my last resort.

Wheezing, I tried to scream for mercy, but my cracked voice fell on deaf ears as three other bodies fell on top of Chaeyoung’s body lying across my own.

“Guys…”

Giggling, they all started getting comfortable on my bed around me, making me smile despite the abrupt awakening.

_Happy birthday to you…_

_Happy birthday to you…_

_Happy birthday dear Seohyeon…_

_Happy birthday to youuuu…_

Having the maknae Chaeyoung’s face close to mine made it so I could only hear her singing, making me smile as I heard her soft vocals. As her voice started to drift off, the alarm I had set to wake up on time for today’s practice went off, making all of us groan and start getting up.

“Come on unnie, I’m sure it’ll be a good day today!”

Smiling slightly at Chaeyoung’s enthusiasm, I ruffled her hair.

“Let’s go!”

* * *

 

_Friday, August 09, 2013_

_06:02PM_

Balancing the chair I was sitting in on its back legs, I drank water as Chaeyoung and I tried to catch our breath during our short break. I was upset. The day was not turning out how I would have liked it, most importantly because it was my birthday. I tried not to let it show too much, since I didn’t want to appear entitled to attention, but it hurt that Seulgi had yet to contact me about my birthday. While we were no longer on the same practice groups, we still remained quite close, and hung out whenever we could spare a moment that we were not practicing, sleeping, or eating.

“Unnie, your phone is ringing.”

“Uh?”

Chaeyoung pointed to my phone on the table, scrunching her nose cutely when I just stared at her confused.

Resisting the urge to roll her eyes, she leaned over and answered for me, pressing the phone to my ear. As she did so, my mouth formed an ‘O’ in realization. Mockingly, she made the same expression, giggling when I made a motion with my hand that I was watching her as I narrowed my eyes at her.

“Hello?”

_“Seohyeon! Are you also on break right now? Come meet me! I’m by the bathrooms close to your vocal practice room!”_

“Seu- Seulgi?”

_“Yes silly! Come quick!”_

“But—,” pulling the phone away from my ear, I looked at the screen, noticing that she had hung up on me before I could get another word out.

“Go ahead, bunny… We still have a few minutes before we have to head back in. I’ll call you if you’re about to be late. I know you’ve been looking forward to seeing Seulgi today.” Said Chaeyoung, a soft smile lighting up her face.

Blushing, I stuttered as I stood up to head out, “Ye-yes. I’ll be right back. Thanks, ChaeChae.”

Giggling, she sent me thumbs up as I started heading for the door, taking longer strides the more steps I covered.

As I sped through the hallways, I remembered what had brought me to this point. The turmoil I still felt whenever I saw Seulgi, realizing that I had been in love with her at first sight, and not realizing it. Her existence, the concept of who she represented in my life, had irrevocably changed me, at first passing through my life like a hurricane, volatile and destructive, turning everything I had ever known upside down. I remembered the day I had finally broken down in Chaeyoung’s arms, sobbing and admitting to her and myself for the first time that yes, I was in love with the one person I would have not expected to be in love with in a million years, yet all Chaeyoung had done was wrap me in her arms with a knowing smile. For someone so young, she was always the one that took care of me after I had exhausted myself taking care of everyone else, our roles almost reversed, considering she was my sunbae.

Coming to the realization that I was so emotionally invested in Seulgi had knocked the wind out of me, which had costed me in some cases, since I had become more distracted during practice hours, considering all I could seem to really do was replay our last conversations in my mind, while at the same time looking forward to our next one. I realized that falling in love at first sight did not mean I would notice it right away, it just meant that when I finally _did_ notice, every single gesture, touch, look, and moment would flash before my eyes, overwhelming my entire being with everything _her_. I later realized that my breakdown with Chaeyoung had happened a few months after I had lost all contact with Jimin, leaving me alone in slight heartbreak, with only her to fill my mind. It had hurt, it had been confusing, so much so that I had felt like I was drowning most of the time. I did not, _could not_ , believe that I was in love with a girl. I knew Seulgi was strictly into girls, but… I was straight. I only liked boys. Boys like Jimin. Boys that made my heart flutter like a hummingbird, and my pulse race with the mere thought of them. Most importantly, it seemed so out of this world, so _not_ possible, to be in love with more than one person at the same time. But then again, whatever it was that I _had_ had with Jimin never really had the time to flourish, ending before it had the chance to begin, like a delicious shiver passing through your body for a moment, only to quickly become a memory the next second. Distance was water dousing our struggling flame. He was a flame within my heart that never really had the chance to fully spark, but Seulgi had become a roaring fire that threatened to burn me _alive_.

“Noona! Are you on your way to see Seulgi? I just passed her!”

Turning my head, I saw Jungkook speeding to his next practice. He was running late, as always.

“Yes, Ggukie!”

“Good luck!” He yelled, suggestively wiggling his eyebrows as he turned a corner and I could no longer see him.

With burning cheeks, I turned the other way to go to the bathrooms Seulgi had indicated. It seemed like everyone knew I was in love before even I knew, but I hoped against the universe itself that Seulgi remained oblivious to it. I would make sure of it, even if it was the last thing I did.

“There you are! I wanted to give you your present in person, not just leave it on your bed for you to find later. Happy 18th birthday, sweet Seohyeonnn.” Dragging out my name, she closed the space between us as we both laughed, hugging each other and swinging from side to side, from where she proceeded to lift me off the floor to twirl me around as best as she could.

“Ah stop Seulgi, please! I’m full of water and I don’t want to throw it all up on you!” I giggled into her neck as I clung to her, blushing as her arms unwound themselves from around my waist.

Grinning brightly at me, she said, “sorry, I got carried away. I’m so happy!”

Giggling again as my heart thumped painfully, I agreed with her sentiment, “Me too, Seulgi.”

Turning around and picking up something off the floor, she faced me and stretched her arms out towards me with a box in her hands.

“Here you go. I’m sorry I couldn’t wrap it up for you, or that it’s not anything fancy. It’s hard to get out of the company building and buy something when we’re so busy.”

Grinning as it felt like fireworks went off on my stomach, I thanked her quietly, “No worries Seulgi, I would love anything that you got me, even if it was just a text saying ‘Happy Birthday,’” my eyes softening as I saw her nervously wringing her hands together as I took my present from her hands.

“What is it?”

“Open it!”  
Looking at it more closely, I realized that it was an old tobacco box, its intricate colors and designs having faded with time, leaving it slightly peeled and looking like a beautiful antique.

Breathily, I told her, “it’s so pretty, Seulgi… Thank you so much…”

Pushing her hair over one shoulder as a nervous habit of hers, she replied back shyly, “It… It was nothing Seohyeon-ah. I’m really glad you liked it. I managed to get some rose petals too and stick them in the box for a few days so that it would have a pleasant smell when you got it. Go ahead and open it, too!”

Distracted by the blush covering her face, I lifted the box lid carefully, my eyes studying her pretty face. Feeling a soft texture under my hands, I finally looked down, only to be met with a beautifully colored scarf of blue, purple, and aquamarine, the colors blending masterfully. Pulling it out from the box, I placed it around my neck as I smiled at her.

“Seulgi this is beautiful! Thank you so much! I love it!”

Smiling back at me, she said, “I know you love the color blue, but since I don’t have time to keep up with the latest fashion, I had to ask my mom what scarf would look best on you.”

My eyes started glittering as I realized that she had asked her mom for help looking for a gift for me. I asked, “how would your mom know if it would look good on me?”

“I sent her a picture of you silly. She mentioned that the blend of colors and that material would look really well on you, complementing your small face, too.”

Blushing at the compliment, I opened my mouth to give one back when my phone rang.

“Oh! I have to go! That must be ChaeChae calling me, practice is starting soon!”

“Go ahead. See you around, Seohyeon.”

Smiling back at her, I turned around and ran back from where I came from, my spirits lifted from my earlier sour mood. This day wasn’t so bad after all.

* * *

 

_Saturday, August 10, 2013_

_12:05AM_

Grunting tiredly, Chaeyoung and I stumbled into our designated room. The small size of our room, while usually cozy, felt irritatingly _tiny_ at the moment as we stumbled through the furniture all over, trying to adjust our eyes to the darkness.

“You go on ahead and take a shower first, ChaeChae. I’ll take one right after you.”

“Thank you, unnie,” came the strained voice from Chaeyoung, drifting from somewhere behind me as we continued to stumble in the dark.

Sitting heavily on my bed, I prepared both of our pajamas, taking them out from beneath our pillows and setting them on my lower bunk bed for easy access for when Chaeyoung came out of the shower. Leaning over, I made sure not to touch my bed too much, not wanting my sweat from practice just a few minutes ago to be absorbed by my clean sheets, as I opened my upper drawer and gently placed the old tobacco box and scarf from Seulgi inside before closing it softly.

Sighing, I cracked my neck, patiently waiting for Chaeyoung to finish up. Since our diets were controlled most of the time by the staff, the fact that I had received a miniature sized cupcake from the staff as a gift for my birthday had warmed me, despite their warning that I would have to work extra hard today to burn those calories off. Smiling at the memory of the soft, buttery chocolate and how it had melted in my mouth, I was startled when Chaeyoung softly touched my shoulder. I hadn’t realized I had started to drift off sitting on my bed.

Looking up at her as my eyes adjusted to the darkness, I smiled as I stood up and headed to the bathroom to wash up myself. As I closed the door to the bathroom behind me, I noticed an envelope on the countertop of the small sink. Chaeyoung’s pretty, cursive handwriting carefully spelling my name on top. Opening it carefully, I sat on the closed toilet lid and read it quickly before showering.

**Dear bunny unnie~  
Thank you for being such a caring and wise unnie towards me. I consider you my best friend despite our age difference, and I want you to know that no matter what, I will always love you deeply, and always try to look out for you as you look out for me. Thank you for being part of my life, and for sharing your warm, sunshine personality with me every day. It is the greatest gift I could have gotten coming here to the company. Your friendship. Sorry I’m broke and couldn’t get you a proper gift, but I promise to shower you with love and hugs every day, even if it’s not your birthday!  
**

**Love, your ChaeChae.**

Tears gathering in my eyes at the mix of soft, warm feelings mixing in with the exhaustion in my body, I smiled as I put the letter back in the envelope, making sure to place it somewhere it wouldn’t get wet as I got ready to shower.

* * *

 

_Saturday, August 10, 2013_

_02:14AM_

_Brrr…_

_Brrr…_

_Brrr…_

Grunting, I slapped the hand over the lit-up screen of my vibrating phone, squinting as I rolled over to check the clock, sitting up on the bed to check who could be calling me at such an ungodly hour. The managers would kill me if they knew I was awake at this time instead of asleep. Glancing to the side, I blinked my eyes quickly as I waited for them to adjust to the brightness of the screen. I noticed that Chaeyoung had fallen asleep on my bed once again, too tired to climb to the top bunk bed. Not that I minded. The nights in our room were cold, so sharing body heat was never an offer either of us would refuse. As I turned my gaze back to the screen, I felt Chaeyoung wiggle around, getting more comfortable and frowning slightly as a chilly drift sneaked between where our bodies had been.

Quickly looking at the screen to make sure I knew whoever was calling before picking up, cold sweat immediately ran through my body as I recognized the name lighting up my phone at this hour. Stiffening, my finger hovered over the _answer_ button, unsure.

Clear as my memory of our moments spent together, the name _Jimin_ flashed across the screen.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Thank you so much for reading! I finally introduced Jimin and Jeongguk, as well as Rose. Still, there are quite a few characters that have yet to appear, so please bear with me. Thanks to anyone who decides to support this story, and I hope it’s as enjoyable to read as I enjoyed writing it.


	3. Chapter 2 ;

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> **Warnings |** Drug use.

_Saturday, August 10, 2013_

_02:15AM_

With trembling fingers and no rational thoughts crossing my mind, my thumb moved over the screen to cancel the call, only to last minute move over to the _answer_ button, quickly swiping to pick up the call. Gasping as if my body went through a marathon, I slumped, exhausted, as I realized that in the second I had pressed the _answer_ button, the call had been forwarded to voicemail. Tiredly, my eyes moved back over to where Chaeyoung was asleep next to me, having cuddled even closer while I had been distracted. The lack of sleep and the anxiety brought upon by the situation that had just occurred left my mind a jumbled mess, exhaustion taking over my mind as it started to shut down alongside my eyes. As I started to drift off to sleep again while sitting up with the phone on my hand, I felt another vibration coming from my hand.

Now once again more than awake, my eyes quickly scanned over the screen alongside my fingers, unwilling to let this second chance be missed like the first. Pausing for a second, I realized that it had been a text message this time and not a call. Unlocking my phone, I opened the chat Jimin had started, frowning as I tried to decipher what he was trying to say.

Jimin [02:19:43]: Seohn.

Jimin [02:19:50]: Seohhnyeo.

Jimin [02:20:03]: Seohyeon.

Jimin [02:20:05]: Ar you up?.

Jimin [02:20:17]: Plese pick upp.

Jimin [02:20:45]: Havng a hard time txing..

Jimin [02:20:51]: I misss yoii

Texting faster than I could keep up with, I started typing out a message myself telling him to slow down, only to be interrupted with a sudden change of screen on my cell phone caused by his second call of the night. Quickly swiping the _answer_ button, I brought the phone up to my ear.

“Jimin? Are you okay? It’s past 2AM, what are you doing up?”

“Seohyeon! Oh god, Seohyeon. I missed your voice so much, I missed talking to you so—”

“Jimin-ah calm down, you’re slurring. Have you been drinking?”

“Ah… Did you forget? I work at the fancy restaurant on weekends to make extra cash, and today the boss had leftover booze he felt like giving away, so we benefited! I wish you were here… I miss you so much… I… miss kissing you, and looking at you when you were too embarrassed to meet my eyes…”

Noticing his voice start to waver, I realized he was starting to cry, making it even harder to understand him as he went on. Still, all those nights we had spent on the phone without sleep, just talking, laughing, and crying together allowed me to easily decipher his words, making me feel like the happiest girl ever while at the same feeling like a bullet had gone through my chest.

“… Jimin, I rea-really miss you, too…”

Hearing a sharp intake of breath, he immediately started talking once again.

“Swee—”

“N-no. Jimin. Don’t call me that. Please. First, tell me if you’re okay. Did you drive to work today? Are you alone? You’re drinking a lot and I don’t want you to—”

Breathlessly, he cut me off. “I’m okay! The guys and I were just celebrating the good tips after work, and then Hoseok hyung had to go and start talking about his new girlfriend, and I just started thinking of you, and how much I miss you. Yoongi hyung told me it was a bad idea to call but I managed to sneak off to the bathroom while he was occupied. I really needed to talk to you.”

Trying to keep the tears at bay and stop them from making my voice waver like it was doing to him, I took a deep breath and replied slowly, and softly.

“Jimin-ah… I know you. At least I would like to think I still do. You’re very drunk. Please be careful. You should go look for Yoongi oppa and stick to him, okay? I want to talk to you about this, but not when you’re drunk… I _really_ want to talk about this tomorrow morning. So please, sober up and get some sleep, and then we can talk calmly, without the risk of you forgetting whatever it is that we discuss—”

His voice cracking, he cut me off. “Seohyeon. Seohyeon. My beautiful sweetheart. Seohyeon. I know I said… I know I said it was better to never get serious, as we would be separated soon, but I can’t do this anymore. It’s been _months… years_? Since I last saw you. Or heard your voice. God, I missed your voice. I’m not afraid, Seohyeon. I’m willing to try a long-distance relationship. I _cannot_ not be with you…”

Jimin’s voice started to crack more as he spoke and his slurring also got worse, until he stopped speaking and all I could hear was his sniffing and heavy breathing, and in the quietness of the room I was in, it all became too much, and I started to earnestly cry alongside him.

Before I could say something to Jimin, I faintly heard a door opening from his side of the call, followed by the voice of Yoongi oppa talking to him.

“Jimin-ah, give me the phone. I told you this wasn’t a good idea. Look at you.”

“Hyu-hyung. You don’t understand. Please give me a minute—”

Hearing some rustling, Yoongi’s voice came directly through the phone.

“Hello Seohyeon. Don’t worry about Jimin. I’ll make sure he gets home safe, we’ll all be taking a cab home tonight. Please pretend he never called you, this isn’t healthy for either of you.”

“Oppa, please. Just give me a moment to talk to—”

Quick to cut me off, Yoongi’s voice hardened. “No. Jimin’s a mess right now. But it’s better this way. It’s not like anything will change if you guys try talking in this state. Nothing to be done. Seohyeon, I know he contacted you first. But know that I will protect Jimin all I can from getting hurt, and right now that includes having you in his life. Have a safe night, don’t worry about us.”

Before I could say anything, the click of the phone being hung up went off in my ear, snapping me off the fog my brain was threatening to drown me in.

I was frozen in place as I felt warm, soft hands slowly taking the phone away from my hands, where I had cradled it as I kept crying, watching the screen with Jimin’s texts through blurry eyes.

“Bunny unnie… It’s okay… come here… shhhh. I got you, I heard all of it… Just as that Yoongi guy is willing to be an asshole to protect Jimin I’m also willing to have your back. Don’t cry, unnie.”

Realizing I had woken up Chaeyoung with the call and that she had heard it all anguished me even more, while at the same time relieving some of the pressure of my chest. I didn’t want to put her through any kind of hardship, as I regarded her like a younger sibling, and thus I was unwilling to use her as a shield for my pain. Calming down a little, I couldn’t help but keep sniffling, a headache forming around my temples.

“A-ah… we should try to get some more sleep ChaeChae. Thank you for being here…”

Smiling faintly and with eyes glowing with worry, she replied, “Alright, unnie…”

Tightening my arms around her, we both laid down on the now cold mattress and snuggled until we were both cocooned in the warmth of the blanket, slowly letting the exhaustion from earlier take over my body as I drifted off to sleep.

* * *

 

_Saturday, August 10, 2013_

_05:08AM_

Slowly opening my eyes against the bright light of the room, I squinted as I realized I had slightly overslept if Chaeyoung was already up. Groaning at the pounding headache forming once again around my temples, I stretched as best as I could in the confining space of the bottom bunk and sat up. With bleary eyes, I watched as the maknae walked out of the bathroom fully dressed for the day, wearing comfortable leggings and a baggy shirt to accommodate for the long day of practice we had ahead of us.

“Good morning, unnie! I left some aspirin and a glass of water next to you on the dresser, and clothes to change into at the bottom of the bed. I didn’t want you to be late, but I also wanted you to get a few more minutes of rest after… after what just happened. Come on, I’ll go prep some toast and apples for us to-go while you get ready.”

Smiling softly at the never-ending energy coming from the youngest, I turned around and quickly picked up the pill and swallowed it without water, standing up to get the clothes and go change in the bathroom while Chaeyoung left the room to go to the cafeteria to get us some food.

As I came back out of the bathroom while pulling my hair up in a ponytail, I glanced at my phone, seeing that I had a few unread notifications, even after the whole debacle last night. Frowning, I hid it in my sweatpants’ pocket and promptly tried to forget about it, not wanting to deal with more of the same so early in the day. I would look at it later when I had a break. Quickly leaving the room, I took a shuddering breath, reminding me of the puffy eyes and swollen face I had seen being reflected back at me in the bathroom’s mirror, no matter how much cold water I splashed on my face.

As soon as I was about to take a turn around a corner, I almost bumped into Chaeyoung, who simply smiled at me and handed me an apple and cup of steaming tea, and then proceeding to take off her black cap and fixing it upon my head. Realizing my ponytail impeded her doing so, she simply grinned at me and took it off, fluffing my hair around my face to carefully cover my face better with the hat. Letting out a grateful smile, we walked with locked arms towards the vocal practice room.

The quietness of the hallway as we walked through it calmed me with its familiarity, as usually they tended to be empty of workers at this time of the day. Quickly hearing a second pair of shoes resonating through the hallways, Chaeyoung pulled me closer as we quickened our steps.

“It’s alright ChaeChae. I’m okay now.” I said, calmly turning to face her as I tried to give her my most reassuring smile.

“You’re acting like a mom, ChaeChae. Shall I start calling you mama now?” I teased, watching as she relaxed and let out a few chuckles.

“Yah, don’t make fun of me, unnie.”

Gasping, I glanced back at her with a shocked face. “What did you just call me? _Yah,_ you kid. Watch it!”

As we both started giggling, a voice interrupted us.

“Good morning, girls! How are you today?!”

As I turned my head, I saw that the chirping voice belonged to Seokjin, accompanied by Jeongguk on their way to their own schedule for the day.

“Good morning, Jinnie oppa! Jeonggukie. How come you guys are walking together?”

Narrowing his eyes at Chaeyoung, Jeongguk glanced at me as I diverted my eyes to the floor.

“I’m here because Jeonggukie is having trouble with vocals, and his manager requested my help whenever I had some free time. My own practice got pushed back two hours this morning, so I decided this was a good time as any.” Said Jin, quietly sensing the same atmosphere Jeongguk had.

Before any of them could make a comment, I quickly pushed Chaeyoung with me, calling back to the boys as we speed along.

“Well, we can’t stay around to chat or we’ll be late to practice guys! See you around Jin oppa, and good luck with your training Ggukie!”

Quickly calling out a goodbye after me, Chaeyoung giggled as we started to semi-jog along, playing along with me as we finally started to get closer to the practice rooms.

* * *

 

_Saturday, August 10, 2013_

_11:50AM_

Leaning down to stretch my body after sitting down for so long, I let out a ragged breath as I tried to swallow—soothing my sore throat from so many hours of practice. As I stood back up, I realized Gun-ssi had been leaning against the door watching, god knows for how long. When he realized I had finally seen him, he quickly approached me.

“Hello, Seohyeon. How are you today? You seem a bit tired, but from what I just heard your vocals have improved a lot. Good job.”

Quickly bowing at the waist, I thanked him for his praise, keeping my eyes down as I became aware he had been watching my still puffy eyes. Thankfully, I had taken a quick bathroom break in the past hour, and had quickly checked my face in the mirror, noticing that my face was no longer swollen, and the redness of my eyes had gone away. Still, my eyes remained slightly puffy.

Our vocal instructor was a very perceptive man, realizing that something had happened—although he had no idea what—and despite having a reputation of being a hard-ass when it came to grading our performance, he was not a tyrant, and thus allowed me to slowly integrate into the group practice as the morning went on. I knew he would inform Gun-ssi of my slightly off behavior during the first hour of the morning, just in case it became something they needed to keep an eye out for. Hopefully, I would not remain on their radar for long, allowing me to relax as soon as the pressure was off.

Seeing as Gun-ssi was already done talking to me and starting to head towards the instructor, I quickly ducked out of the practice room, hoping to get some time to myself before Chaeyoung or anyone else managed to grab my attention. Closing the door quietly behind me after taking note that everyone else was still collecting their things, I walked briskly down the hallway towards my special spot on the company’s building.

Opening the emergency stairs door open, I slipped through the small opening I made and quickly walked five floors down until I arrived to the 3rd floor. Oddly enough, the 3rd floor was used mostly for storage, so there was rarely anyone here for any reason or another. Walking to the farthest part of the hallway the emergency door opened to, I brought up the neck of my shirt to cover my face from the dust covering the boxes littering the floor, sidestepping carefully around them. When I reached the end of the hallway, I faced the boxes on the left and carefully pulled them towards me, slipping past the opening I managed to make into the tiny space that had opened up after I moved the boxes. Unlatching the huge window, I pushed it open and stepped out onto the concrete railing, wide enough to allow for quite a few people to sit down with no risk of falling.

Carefully making sure the window didn’t close on me, I leaned back against the side of the building and swung my legs over the edge. The view wasn’t the most impressive one around, but considering the agency was located in the middle of the city, the fact that one of the few parks around was located right next to the building was a welcome blessing. Watching the trees sway and rustle with the wind of the early afternoon, I closed my eyes and breathed in. It was a rare day when trainees managed to leave the building, so I was thankful I had found this place, closed off from everyone and open. Slowly opening my eyes, I realized I couldn’t keep putting off what I had to do, and thus took out my phone from my side pocket.

It appeared as if Yoongi had given Jimin his phone back shortly after ending the call, or Jimin had managed to sneak it away from him, and knowing them both, I was betting on the latter. Shortly after I had fallen asleep, it seemed Jimin had sent me more text messages.

Jimin [02:47:08]: Sweeheartt

Jimin [02:47:18]: I want to try agaian, we willl mak it wok

Jimin [02:47:42]: Please.

Jimin [02:47:58]: I louve youu

My fingers froze over the screen, my mind going a mile a minute as I tried to recall _when,_ or _if_ in our past memories we ever told each other those words. No. No. I was sure. We had _never_ said it. For my part, I certainly felt it, even now, my heart ached, realizing we left so many things unsaid and unresolved. We never had a proper goodbye. One day we just stopped. As if a silent agreement had passed between us, when the pain of being apart became too much. Even in our last conversation, we had not spoken seriously, acting as if it was any other day, sending each other funny jokes, and just telling each other the little nuances of our day. We had never told each other _I love you_. I could feel it on my skin when his gaze became too intense, or when he smiled a little too big for the most insignificant thing I did, like sit down next to him at the park. When he leaned down for no reason to softly press an innocent peck on my lips, holding his own lips against mine without moving, and pressing me tighter against him. I could certainly _feel_ his love. But we had never _said_ it.

Heart racing, I rationalized, “ _but was saying it really necessary?”_

Did it really need to be said, when we could _feel_ it so clearly between us and all around us whenever we were together? _No._ It did not have to be said, because we both knew. At that age, we were both so young, we still were, and the thought of expressing our love versus saying it was two completely different things. Saying it made it scary, because we both knew we did not have long before we were separated by our respective futures.

Remembering what he had said when he called me, I quickly shot him a text.

Seohyeon [12:13:24]: Jiminie. Are you up? How’s your head?

Seohyeon [12:13:31]: … Do you remember what happened last night?

Holding my breath, I awaited his reply. The ball was in his court. He could either tell me he remembered and we could discuss what had happened—which brought hope to my chest no matter how much I tried to squash it—or he could pretend he did not remember any of it. Jimin was not the type to get to drunk very often, and he never blacked out. Plus, there were the text messages. There was _no way_ he could honestly say he had no idea what had happened last night…

Seohyeon [12:17:01]: Please.

Jimin [12:17:20]: Sorry. I don’t remember what happened.

The sound of the wind echoed in my ears until it became a gentle roar in my head, the coldness biting into my skin and leaving prickles behind. Swallowing hard, I pocketed my phone without bothering to reply. Clenching my hands on my lap, I tried to smile as I moved my face up to the sky to unsuccessfully try to feel the little sun there was on this cloudy day. Slowly, I counted backwards from ten, taking deep breaths in between numbers without letting my mind wander from them. Before I managed to get down to two, a soft knock came from the window next to me.

Turning around, I saw the frowning face of Jin, looking at me worriedly. Waving a hand, I invited him to join me outside. Once he had carefully situated his big body on the ledge, he threw his arm over my shoulder and pulled me into him.

“How are you?”

Smiling softly, I was honest. “I’m hanging in there, Jin oppa.”

“Good girl,” he said, as he softly pressed a kiss to my forehead before turning to also stare at the trees across from us.

“Did Chaeyoung tell you what happened?”

“You know she worries about you. She doesn’t have any family, and she sees you as her older sister.”

Sighing, I replied. “I know, I’m not mad at all that she told you. If anything, I’m grateful. That way I don’t have to repeat all of it.”

“She also mentioned that she had seen some unread messages from Jimin on your phone this morning before you woke up?”

Sighing, I wordlessly took out my phone again and unlocked it, passing it on to Jin without even turning to look at him.

Understanding what I was doing, he took the phone from my hand and opened up the messages. A few quiet moments passed before he locked the screen again. Holding the phone in his large hand, I noticed from the corner of my eyes how he pursed his lips—something he only ever did when he was bothered or angry. Softly placing my hand on top of his, I tried to relieve the tight grip he had on my phone before taking it back.

“Sorry. I didn’t realize I was holding it so tightly.”

“Mmmm. It’s okay, oppa.”

A few beats of silence passed between us before he spoke again.

“He was a coward. And that Yoongi guy should not have been so rude to you. It was not even you who made the first step anyway, he had no right to speak to you so harshly as if—”

“It’s okay, oppa. I understood where he was coming from. We weren’t terribly close, at least not like he is with Jimin. He sees him as a little brother.”

Glancing at me, he murmured, “and I consider you my little sister. I won’t let anyone treat you like that either. Chaeyoung, too.”

Smiling softly, I thanked him.

“Plus, I have a feeling that Chaeyoung herself will fillet this Goondi guy before I even get to stand up.”

Throwing back my head as I laughed, I lightly pushed his wide shoulders as best as I could with his other arm still around me.

“Oppa! You did that on purpose! That was so lame, even worse than usual!”

“Yah, you little bug! Watch what you say about me. I’m funny _and_ handsome, I could destroy your popularity if word gets out that you’ve been bullying me…”

Giggling at the way he kept exaggerating, I shook my head, realizing that his original intention had been to distract me.

“I’m sorry, oppa. Thank you.” I said earnestly, hoping I could convey just how grateful I was for his friendship and help.

“Just say that I’m handsome and funny and I’ll forgive you.”

Teasingly, I replied back just as quick, “never.”

Watching his eyes widen comically, I quickly kept going before he could start ranting and getting redder than he already was.

“But I’ll say it just because I love you, my handsome _and_ funny oppa!”

Breathlessly laughing along, he said, “yah! Stop playing with me. I’m your oppa, not a child.”

“And here I thought we had all been raising a six-year-old Kim Seokjin this whole time.”

Shaking his head in exasperation, he just tightened his hold around my shoulders.

“Careful now, Seohyeon, I hold your life on my hands.”

“You wouldn’t dare!”

“You’re right! I wouldn’t! But don’t tempt me!”

Giggling, I admitted defeat.

Clearing his throat, he took up a more serious tone.

“Seohyeon-ah. All joking aside, seeing you hurting like this hurts _all_ of us. Yes, don’t look at me like that, _all of us_. Even Taehyung. He can be a pain in the ass but that’s just because Jungkookie is a bad influence on him. They were all searching for you before I realized you probably came here to specifically get away from the mayhem our group seems to cause wherever they go.”

Grinning slightly, he went on. “I don’t blame you. I need to get away from you kids from time to time, too. Anyway, please, _please_ listen carefully to me. I need you to be a little selfish at this moment. I need you to make yourself a priority, to make your feelings and health your only priority, and worry about the other kids later. If it will make you feel better, I will make sure they’re fed and burped multiple times a day, but—”

Lightly smacking his hand, I giggled as I tried to keep him on track.

“Right, anyway. That was my first request. My second one more like me scolding you rather than a request, but whatever. You need to get your feelings in order, Seohyeon. This push and pull you create with your own feelings toward Jimin and Seulgi will only end badly, so while I disagree with the way this _Yoongi_ person addressed the situation, I do agree that you should sort out your own shit first before anything. In the long run, this might also save others from heartbreak.”

“Thank you, oppa…”

“I just want what’s best for you, Seohyeon,” he whispers, propping his head up on top of my own.

Before our conversation could pick up once again, there was a faint sound of voices drifting from the opened window.

“That sounds like Chaeyoung, looks like she’s trying to keep Seulgi from finding our special spot, Seohyeon. Come on, let’s hurry.”

“You mean _my_ spot, Jin oppa.” I said, quickly but carefully maneuvering to stand up from the ledge and go back through the window after him.

Shushing me, he quietly pushed me through the boxes after locking the window behind us, moving the boxes back in place faster than I could to avoid our little spot from being found out. Starting to speed walk towards the stairs, we bump into Chaeyoung and Seulgi as we got closer.

“Hey guys! What are you doing here?”

Smiling at Chaeyoung’s apologetic look, I looked towards Seulgi as I awaited her response.

Warm eyes looked back at me as she quickly pushed me into her arms and squeezed me, “I was worried…” Came Seulgi’s mumbled reply, as she had pressed her face against my neck.

Clearing my throat, I hugged her back as I tried my best to let out a light laugh.

“You have nothing to worry about Seulgi, I’m fine.” _It’s not like you’re part of the reason I’m like this or anything…_

Letting go of me, she said quietly, “if you’re sure…”

“I am.”

“Chaeyoung, what time is it?”

Looking down at her phone to check the time, she quickly replied back to Jin.

“Almost 1PM, oppa. We should start heading back now.”

Scurrying along, we all started to walk up the long flight of stairs that awaited us.

“That reminds me! It was lunch time, Seohyeon! Did you eat?!” Came the alarmed voice of Seulgi.

“Ahh… you see… Seokjin oppa interrupted me as I was going to start heading towards the cafeteria—”

“Oh no! Don’t you dare put this on me! I was being a nice friend and all I get in return is—”

“Oppa, calm down. We all know that was a weak excuse on her part.”

“Yah! Chaeyoung, more respect to your elders, please!”

Giggling, Jin said, “That’s what you get for disrespecting _your_ elders, Seohyeon.”

Pouting, I looked away from him, but gratefully took the cup of fruit he was offering me from his hands.

“Where were you hiding this, Jin oppa? I didn’t see you holding anything before. Thanks.”

“A handsome guy doesn’t reveal his secrets, Seohyeon.”

“I saw it! It was hidden in his sweater’s front pocket!”

Giggling, I thanked Chaeyoung for being observant.

Seokjin simply smiled, happy that the atmosphere was light and full of banter now.

Seulgi slowed down to match my steps, hugging me from behind as we kept walking. Flustered, I vaguely heard her whisper in my ear, “who keeps a cup of _melons_ hidden in their pocket anyway? Isn’t that weird?”

I giggled as I saw from the corner of my eyes how Jin rolled his eyes, letting out a heavy sigh but not commenting at Seulgi’s jab. It seemed like he had reached his limit of patience for the day.

“That reminds me, I heard rumors that Namjoon oppa was going to change companies, soon. Is that right, Jinnie oppa?” Came the voice of Chaeyoung, concern filtering through her voice.

Jin oppa hummed along as Seulgi and I giggled, so I quickly started talking before Jin could say something.

“How does a _cup of melons_ remind you of Namjoon oppa, ChaeChae??”

Blushing, she stammered, “It-it doesn’t _really_ , but I didn’t know how else to bring it up—”

Before we ran out of time to keep talking, Seokjin interrupted Chaeyoung to reply to her original question.

“I don’t _believe_ so, but I cannot be 100 percent sure…”

Now worried myself, I asked, “don’t you talk to him the most, Jin oppa?”

Despite nodding his head, Jin said, “I do, but I haven’t seen him around lately.”

As we got closer to the practice rooms, we all started to bid each other farewell, going our separate ways according to our assigned schedule.

Walking into the dance practice room alongside Chaeyoung, I frowned, thinking of what was going on with Namjoon oppa for there to be those types of rumors circulating around. I laid the forgotten cup of melon fruit close to Chaeyoung’s bag near the door, stretching to prepare for practice. _I should send him a text as soon as I have some free time…_ Or I could also just pay him a visit?

* * *

 

_Saturday, August 24, 2013_

_3:36PM_

“Thank you for your hard work!” Came the call of my rap instructor.

Quickly bowing before leaving the room, I replied in kind quietly—my voice too sore for anything louder.

Today the dance instructor had taken the day off, as he had informed us beforehand that he was planning to get married and would be taking a short vacation time during the next few days. This meant that the girls’ dance practice had to be merged with the boys’, and we had all been given explicit instructions for our behavior over the next few classes, as well as the change in our schedule. This was also going to be used as a chance to perform a few boys’ and girls’ choreographies, and seeing the trainees’ dynamics with each other. While nothing was explicitly said, this clearly translated into, “you’ll be evaluated during this time on various things, but we will not tell you what they are. Sorry.”

Sighing in irritation, I continued walking down the hall, contemplating whether to take a nap or get some food. Since dance practice was canceled today, the girls now had a rare break in the day. Briefly pausing to consider my options, I hummed as I realized I had forgotten to get in touch with Namjoon oppa to confirm or deny those rumors. The days after the Jimin incident were strenuous at best, and none of us had any time to rest at all.

Deciding on a course of action, I started walking as I pulled out my phone from my back pocket.

Seohyeon [15:39:02]: Food?

Namjoon [15:39:10]: Bribe?

Seohyeon [15:39:14]: ;)

Namjoon [15:39:19]: Fine. Come right now. I’m in my room.

Seohyeon [15:40:00]: At this time of the day…?

Namjoon [15:40:13]: Guys’ practice was also canceled.

Namjoon [15:40:22]: Want to light up and play games?

Seohyeon [15:40:28]: Deal.

Briskly exiting the cafeteria with a meat sandwich and a small salad, I started heading to Namjoon’s room, being careful that no managers had seen me walking towards the guys’ dorm side of the building. Slightly frowning, I looked down at the meat sandwich. It had been a bit of a splurge, but as Namjoon had stated, this was a bribe, and nothing said bribe like _meat_.

Quickly arriving to his door, I didn’t bother knocking, knowing he was already expecting my arrival. Closing the door behind me, I squinted as I tried to spot Namjoon in the poor lighting in the room.

“Joonie oppa? Where are you?”

“In the bathroom!”

“Ah, are we smoking first, then?”

“Duh. Otherwise we’ll just get hungry afterwards _again_. We don’t have the cash to spare,” he called out, popping his head out of the now open bathroom door.

Narrowing my eyes, I replied just as snarky, “so says the guy that continuously spends an unmentioned amount of money on _weed_.”

“You’re not complaining.”

“You got me there.”

Offering me a smile full of teeth and dimples, he ducked back into the bathroom.

“I’m almost done, come in before I finish this without you.”

Due to the fact that the guys’ dorms were closer to the offices of some lower level workers, the heaters seemed to work _extra well_. Huffing, I pulled off my sweater, leaving me in a simple tank top and leggings. As I approached the bathroom, I quickly opened the door and closed it behind me, making sure the smoke that was already present didn’t blow out into the room. Just like the bathroom in Chaeyoung’s and my room, Namjoon’s was _tiny_ , and the fact that Namjoon was lanky and all long legs didn’t help. To make it worse, the only window on the bathroom was inside the shower stall, so I carefully stepped inside and huddled close to Namjoon, intertwining our legs carefully to avoid kicking him in the balls by accident. In the end, we ended up sitting diagonally to each other, legs looking more like a tangled mess of spaghetti by the second due to smoke inhalation—the little fan he had set up to blow the smoke out the window not helping much. Quickly passing the joint, I scrunched up my nose up at him, since the curve of the tub left me reclining awkwardly against it.

“Stiff or—”

“Nah. I know you don’t do cigarettes, girly. No worries.”

“How _sweet_.”

Showing me his dimples once again, he simply urged me to take the joint once again from his hand.

I reached out with my left arm, not realizing how much of my weight it was supporting, until a loud _squeak_ echoed in the bathroom. I had just literally _slid_ down to a laying position, Namjoon’s legs painfully digging into my middle.

Laughing loudly, Namjoon yelled out, “what the hell was that?”

Now scowling, I glared up at him, trying and failing to sit back upright.

“Oh! I don’t fucking know, Joonie. Maybe I just slid—”

Narrowing his eyes right back at me, he cut me off as he kept laughing.

“No, girly. I meant that squeak. That was _not_ you sliding down, that came out of your goddamn mouth. Also, who told you that you could talk down at me?”

Huffing, I let out a small “I’m sorry,” and proceeded to raise my arms up so he would help me.

Still chuckling, he placed the joint on my lips and instructed me to inhale before the whole thing burnt and I didn’t get any, leaning down as best as he could from his own position on the shower stall to wrap his left arm around my waist and push me up while I did my best to help the process go faster. Once sitting back up, I took a deeper inhale of the joint, holding it in while quickly passing it to Namjoon, placing it on his lips as he continued to help make sure I wouldn’t slide down again. Carefully, I turned my body, so now the both of us were sitting next to each other—Namjoon’s legs over the edge of the tub and my own thrown over his—curled up to help me keep balance.

We were holding onto each other to make sure we didn’t slip, because although my accident had been funny, it _was_ possible to crack one’s head open in this godforsaken small tub, and neither of us wanted that—the hassle of having to explain the _weed_ smell in the bathroom being the least of our problems.

“Namjoon oppa—”

“Don’t. I don’t even know myself this time if those goddamn rumors are true or not.”

“But Jin oppa said that—”

With a fond look in his eyes and soft tone that contradicted his harsh words, he cut me off once again.

“That piggy needs to keep his trap shut.”

“He didn’t really say anything. ChaeChae asked him a question and _because_ he didn’t really answer it is the reason why I got worried, too.”

Sighing as he placed the joint on my mouth roughly, he cleared his throat. I knew he just did that to shut me up. The asshole.

“He isn’t a very good liar, is he?”

Giggling around the joint, I agreed with him.

“Well, truth is… You can’t tell anyone, girly. Got it?”

“Cross my heart and hope to die.”

Rolling his eyes at my attempt to lighten the mood, he continued. “Well, anyway. The truth is that I’m thinking of leaving. N—”

“To what company?!”

Sending me a quick glare for interrupting him, he pretended I hadn’t spoken.

“ _Not_ to go to another company, girly. Just. Leaving. I haven’t been happy for a long while now, and Seokjin understands. _We are not breaking up._ We’ll just be… seeing a little less of each other.”

Heart clenching, I quietly spoke. “That… That is very brave of you, Namjoon oppa. Really. Here I am crying because I can’t make my heart stop aching for a stupid boy and an oblivious girl, and you’re making adult decisions and—”

He squeezed me to his side tightly, cutting me off with the abrupt movement.

“Don’t worry about it. It’s not happening anytime soon. And you’ll get plenty of warning. Jin and I are still working out the kinks,” he said, sending a wink my way.

I gave him a sad, small smile. To be honest, when I had said that it was brave of him to leave the company just like that, what had really hit home was the fact that _he was willing to make a long-distance relationship work_. In fact, he sounded so sure that it wasn’t even a question of whether or not it would work. Because it would.

* * *

 

_Saturday, August 24, 2013_

_5:58PM_

Pushing the door of the bathroom open, Namjoon came out with two steaming cups of ramen, carefully walking over to the bed to hand me one. Nudging me to scoot over, I did so carefully, as hot liquid and being high were not a good mix.

“What about the sandwich I got you?” I said, pouting at the fact that my bribe had been rejected.

“I’m saving it for Seokjin, I know he likes that kind from the cafeteria, and he texted me earlier today complaining that they had run out of them.”

I grinned back at him, getting comfortable under the covers with him as he set up the old video game system for us to play.

Placing a finger over my lips, I quietly told him in between giggles. “I took the last one.”

Throwing his head back to laugh, he replied. “I’ll keep it a secret. Don’t worry. Plus, I saw your stupid salad. You need to eat more, girly, so I made you one of my ramen cups from my secret stash. I know you had to rap today, and the hot liquid will help soothe your throat. Don’t tell Seokjin and be grateful.”

I grinned back at him. “Then I’ll keep it a secret, too.”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Don't forget I'm also on [Tumblr](https://fklve.tumblr.com/)!


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